A lot of this blog has been discussing my past, but I thought I’d just write a post to give an update on how I am doing right now. I’ve got some real struggles that I’m dealing with that are stressing me out, but there are still a few rays of sunshine.
I’ve been mostly unemployed since January of 2023. Credit Suisse laid me off in their aggressive purges to try to stay in business, and they gave me until the end of June as a severance package. In July, I signed on with the Regionalen Arbeitsvermittlungszentrum (or RAV), which is the Swiss unemployment service. After having worked for Credit Suisse for more than a decade in Switzerland, I was granted 400 days of unemployment payments at 80% of my previous salary. All in all, that was a pretty good deal — far better than I would have gotten in the United States, I think.
I worked for three months for Mettler Toledo, but I didn’t meet their expectations, and they let me go at the end of the three-month probationary period. I guess I had kind of thought those three months wouldn’t count as “unemployment” months, because RAV wasn’t paying me, but I recently found out that they did, and that my “end of unemployment” date was April 20, 2025.
To add to that, the Swiss migration authorities renewed my residence permit only until… July 2, 2025. So I have roughly 7 weeks of payments and four months left to live in Switzerland (although I can stay for an additional 90 days on a travel visa as an American.) The pressure is really on me now.
So far, in 2025, I’ve now applied for 150 positions: 60 in January, 90 in February. I’ve also been taking online courses to get certified in new skills to add to my CV. I became a certified Professional Scrum Product Owner last week, and in early April I have a course scheduled to get my IREB Requirements Engineering certification. Both of those were paid for by the RAV, thankfully (or at least they agreed to reimburse me.) I’ve also requested some other trainings and I’m waiting to hear back if they will approve them also.
It’s a lot harder applying for a job at age 50 than it was last time I was unemployed (about 25 years ago). Also, I’m trying to transition from a straight programming role into more of a leadership role, which I think would suit me and my skills better, but my resume doesn’t really show a lot of my leadership abilities in my work experience. Doing all that with the added threat of bankruptcy and deportation? It’s pretty stressful.
Fortunately, I’m taking anti-depressants again, which is helping. I’m back in therapy now with the therapist I’ve been seeing for several years. We stopped last June because she went on maternity leave and I was in a good place then. Now it’s clear that I need more help. She went into private practice in the meantime, so it took a while for her to be able to handle the bureaucracy to charge insurance and such. Now I’m seeing her again on a weekly basis, and I think that will be crucial as I go into the next few stressful months.
My relationship was a little off-balance for December and January but I think we’re back on track now. My kids are doing well, although I worry about what impact the current news will have on them. (My ex-wife and I have agreed that it’s best to do some exploration of the reality and possible resolutions first before we talk to them about it.) And I do have a good group of friends who are helping to recommend me for jobs and support me.
So, stressed but hopeful still. I think that’s where I stand right now. I wonder if I can apply for 100 jobs in March?
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